A friend of mine asked me recently if she could wear a black & white printed dress as a guest for a wedding. Now, a lot of my friends ask me about wedding etiquette. While I’m glad to fill them in as much as I know, I think the majority of the people in their 20’s don’t actually know wedding etiquette anyways. I think the best rule of thumb is to make your judgment based on the bride — after all, it’s kind of her Attention Day and if she doesn’t care, then neither should you.  Or if you think she’s the sensitive type, then be overly sensitive to whatever the case is.

Here are some of my tips on wedding ettiquette:

A: Most people would say depending on what type of venue/budget their wedding is, at least cover the cost of your meal. I, however, would also think about how good of a friend that person/couple is. If they are my best, dearest friends, I would pick something pretty nice off their registry (like a really nice pan/dish set) and also add something sentimental on top of that. I usually do hair/makeup as a wedding gift (which is really helpful both ways), give a registered gift AND I give them a housewarming gift in a few weeks.  I know that’s over the top for some of you, but these are for my absolute dear friends that have walked with me through everything.  (I noticed that married folks tend to give better wedding presents because they totally know what it’s like to go through that whole fiasco!)

Q: If I know both the groom & bride equally, which side should I sit on at the ceremony?
A: Honestly, this is just my personal opinion, but I’d say sit on the bride’s. I feel like the bride would be the one to care about something like that, and the groom probably has no idea that the room is even split like that. =) The whole day should cater to the bride. Make her look popular!

A: Honestly, if you can afford it—-yes. And I’m not just saying this because I’m a wedding vendor But also as someone who was working in the food & service industry… you have no idea what a tip does to their day. Even if it’s not that big of a tip, it really adds a sense of “class” to that person and makes them feel like they’re walking on clouds. Most people DO tip, so it kind of stands out if you don’t.  Who should you tip?  Anyone who is doing an act of service and who you’re satisfied with. If you’re not satisfied, I don’t think you need to tip. ALSO, I think if you’re on a super tight budget, another great “tip” would be to write them a fantastic review. A great review goes a long way!

A: A lot of people do this differently. I think traditionally people give their e-ring to their Maid of Honors and then wear it after they receive their wedding band (after the ceremony.) Some people choose to wear it and then have the wedding band on top, even though it’s supposed to be on the bottom. I personally had my MOH wear it during the ceremony and give it to me afterwards. I felt that there were two symbolic gestures; one was my MOH given the responsibility to wear my e-ring for me, and the other was to have nothing on my 4th ring finger while your Husband-in-the-Making was putting the wedding band on you.  I don’t think there’s anything wrong with any of these ways— just whatever you personally want!

If anyone has any other Wedding Etiquette questions, please let me know and I’m happy to give my two cents!